Wednesday, January 28, 2015
We had four months to go before Nash would be a brother.
There were no signs.
Was there even a horse? It didn't matter, she had done this before.
My husband beat the ambulance. We laugh about that now. I remember being wheeled to the Maternity floor and he was standing just beyond the handoff from the ambulance to the nurses that were notified I would be arriving.
Michael held my hand.
The sight was gruesome.
Looking back, I think we were too paralyzed to ask.
We were admitted to the hospital last Monday (1/25) with extreme bleeding. After a trip in the ambulance and a lot of chaos and prayers, baby and I were stabilized and moved from the labor and delivery hall to a 'Special Care Maternity unit'. We have been monitored all week with hopes that the bleeding would subside. (Nash was even able to visit a few times - clearly the highlight).
This year, I am going back through these old posts for the first time. This is not an attempt to live in the past, but rather an attempt to let go. My hope is to move farther from the birth of our preemie to helping others that are where we were four years ago today. It is quite a journey, one I am willing to 'relive' then let go.
This is just another step in the process.